No, really. This post is rated R. So go away, kiddos.
Every language has its incredibly creative swear words, and believe it or not, the Dutch swear words listed below are serious stuff.
klootzak testicle sac
lul de behanger Prick the wallpaperer
Christus te paard Christ on horseback
klerelijer cholera sufferer
teringlijer tuberculosis sufferer
stoephoer sidewalk whore
achterlijke gladiool retarded gladiola
afgelikte boterham licked-off sandwich
armoedzaaier spreader of poverty
bezopen kokosmakroon Drunk macaroon
bleeksheet pale fart
kankerhoer cancer whore
takkenwijf bitch with firewood
eikel acorn
flapdrol floppy turd
halve zool half a shoe sole
kloothommel testicular bumblebee
krentenkakker raisin pooper
mierenneuker ant fucker
lulletje rosewater little Dick rosewater
pokkenwijf chicken pox bitch
schijtlaars shit boot
stuk vreten piece of food
zak sac
zakkenwasser sac cleaner – testicle cleaner
Then there are diseases that people wish each other:
Krijg de kanker Get cancer
Krijg de kolere Get cholera
Krijg de tering Get tuberculosis
Krijg de vliegende vinkentering Get extra-pulmonary finch tuberculosis
Have you noticed the number of swears with diseases? Read more here.
That’s a seriously long list of swear words – do we have that many in English? Perhaps we do, but I just don’t know them!
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Oh, there are way more than those. These are just the ones that are funny when translated literally.
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